Today my guest is Leslie Gray Streeter, pop culture columnist, journalist, and author of Black Widow: A Sad-Funny Journey Through Grief for People Who Normally Avoid Books with Words Like “Journey” in the Title
We talked about:
- Leslie’s book Black Widow: A Sad-Funny Journey Through Grief for People Who Normally Avoid Books with Words Like “Journey” in the Title
- Making jokes about having to deal with the absurdities that come with your husband dying on your watch
- The performative “sad-face-head-tilt-sigh” some people give widows
- How some widows were able to take on 2020 in a very prepared way- isolation and having to do stuff we don’t want to do? Oh we got this. We go with the flow and have a sense of humor about it.
- Why we feel kind of smug as widows
- Do we have gallows humor or a desperate coping mechanism?
- Patton Oswalt’s bit about the Polish Woman of Doom (he’s a widower!)
- What has happened to us is absurd and absurdism is the foundation of comedy
- How widowers are often portrayed as hot and widows are portrayed as hags in media and other double standards (this is seen on the show The Bachelor)
- How widows are often accused of killing their husbands
- Being an authentic sarcastic and messy widow who eats french fries out of her purse.
- People who are defensive of our husbands… who didn’t know them
- The pushback we receive when we don’t react how people want us to react
- Sex and dating after being widowed
- People project their own fears of being forgotten onto widows who find love again
- How having deep relationships with our husbands primes us for wanting a deep connection again. Just because we want to love again passionately doesn’t mean we don’t love our husbands.
- Our husbands told us they wanted us to find love again if they passed away before we did